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Back in those early days of the pandemic we were adapting and adjusting. After 2 years I’m tried of adjusting and adapting. I want routine. I want to know what to expect. I want to be good at my job again.

One example of this comes from our morning worship set-up. At the Trinity building we spent $5000 on equipment to do online worship, but we are rethinking that system as the first cameras I bought aren’t working well as we’ve changed how we broadcast each week due to a lag with the sound and image. In those early days I was just preaching to my laptop. Now we are talking about joy sticks for close ups and other concepts I don’t comprehend.

I’m excited to get back to dinner church next month. Yet once again we will all have to adapt to celebrating our gatherings in another way. The constant change and uncertainty is exhausting. And the questions about safety and monitoring covid hospitalizations continue to be a burden on all of us in leadership.

I am weary and it feels like so many others are as well. This back to normal but not normal, what even is normal anyway sense is hard, especially after more than 1,000,000 deaths. Especially after loss and isolation.

So next week I’m going on vacation. I’ve decided I don’t have to know what we are doing or what the church will look like in 5 years. All I have to do is show up and listen. Show up and love. Show up and try the next right thing. To show up well we need rest, we need care and so that’s what I’m doing now.

-Eilidh