When I was 11 years old I got to attend a week of camp at Loon Lake United Methodist Camp. We built teepees to sleep in, cooked over fires, explored the woods, and learned about the beauty of God with us in creation. One of the traditions at camp was to hike up to Echo Ridge. We’d build a fire up there, eat dinner as a camp, and yell out into the void, with our echo bouncing back I was walking with my new bestie Bianca. There was a large group ahead of us, and behind us we could see one of the Counselors, Christy, walking with 3 other kids. Behind them were more campers & counselors.
As time wore on Bianca and I fell back, walking with Christy and the three others. Eventually we all realized something was wrong. Unbeknownst to us that large group had turned off the main trail on to the Echo Ridge side trail. Being new to camp the 6 of us didn’t know where the turn off was. Someone did go back to the main trail with a sign pointing the way to Echo Ridge, but at that point we’d already walked past. It took a while for folks to realize we were missing. A camper had gotten sick on the hike up and he had gone back to camp with some of the staff. Af first it was assumed we were with that group. Meanwhile we were hiking higher and higher into clear cut lands, across narrow trails. We assumed we had taken a turn that we hadn’t realized and wandered off the trail. It was really dark when we stopped, trying to decide what to do. Do we keep walking? Do we stop and wait to be found? Do we try to turn around?
The sheriff was called in, messages left for our parents, and staff started a search. We started singing church songs to keep our spirits up as we headed back the direction we thought we had come.
After about an hour we rounded a bend and saw headlights. Immediately we all began weeping. Christy collapsed to the ground. We had been doing our best to brave through the situation and I can’t imagine the stress on her as the 19 year old adult in the mix. It wasn’t until our rescue was on the horizon that our fears took over.
That is what I think is happening to us as a community right now. This nightmare of a pandemic seems to be coming to a close. Vaccines and heard immunity are just around the corner and it’s now, after surviving for 12 months that the feelings we have held at bay rear their heads. We are feeling the fear of getting sick, the grief of so much lost, the exhaustion of trying to keep it all together in overwhelming waves. It may seem like with hope should come only joy, but in reality now that it’s almost over we can allow ourselves to truly feel the trauma of this year.
Be gentle with your self. Cry, rage, sleep. Keep up the health and safety protocols that have allowed us to get this far. And know that God is like this, the recuser. The one that picks us up of the ground and fiercely holds us as we let all the responsibility and pain out.
-Eilidh
Recent Comments