This year has not been at all like we expected. Many of us are grieving cancelled plans, lost time with families, milestones unlike anything we’ve known. My daughter was supposed to march with her high school band at Disneyland. I was supposed to speak at the Cleveland High School graduation. My best friend and her family missed out on a long anticipated family wedding. There is so much loss, big and small. As I was thinking about this on our walk last night I realized that over the course of these 7 months I can’t really keep track any more of what was supposed to be. So instead I started thinking about all the things we had gained.
- We’ve gone on 3 vacations with my best friend’s family who are our bubble family. We’ve also done a ton of other things together including dinners, game nights, pumpkin patch visits, cleaning out our fridge, and going on hikes. We never had the time for all of this during normal life and the result has been a new closeness with that whole family for all 3 of us Lowerys.
- Today I got to eat lunch with my daughter and talk about the book she’s reading. During normal life I would drop her at school at 8am and not see her again until 4 or so when se was hungry and exhausted. We have so much more time together now for chats, driving lessons, tv watching, and various shenanigans. Since we’ve only got 3 years until college this extra time is so precious.
- Our cat Max has discovered a love for leash life, spending hours sitting outside while my husband worked from his patio office.
- My aunts and female Shaffer cousins get together for a weekly zoom where we respond to a question (this week is what pets did you have growing up and what is a story about one or what exotic animal have you seen, ridden, or touched?). It has been great to get to know these ladies better.
- I have also been able to watch Taize worship on zoom each week and renew my spirit though that experience.
- As a family we have saved a ton of time not traveling to work, school and meetings, which has a positive environmental impact as well.
- We have gotten to a bunch of house projects we never had time for in the past, although there are still more to go!
- Jeff has been able to spend the summer with us, and he was able to spend lots of time helping his parents in Chicago this spring as they made the move to assisted living. This has also improved our garden yield as he had time for one of his favorite hobbies.
There are so many emotions we are experiencing right now. It’s important in this moment in our lives to grieve what we have lost and to celebrate what we have gained. Both are true for us, gain and loss, and so we honor what we had planned, what we missed, what was revealed in the adjustments to a new rhythm of life, and what is still unfolding.
May you find comfort in grief and joy in celebration.
-Eilidh
Recent Comments