We are in a season of systems shift here at the Parish. We’re hammering out the business plan for Steele Street School. We have a team in place to engage in pieces of the work, but at the and of the day it falls to me to complete and finalize the plan and I don’t want to. I don’t want to risk. I don’t want to do the hours of work it takes to run the numbers and make it all flow. I don’t want to change relationships with our building partner Blooming Gardens and negotiate a new arrangement. I don’t want to give this project the mental space it needs. This is something I’ve never done before. It’s hard and delicate and it might fail I’d rather just coast along doing what we’ve always done.
But I know that God is calling. So I’m setting small goals for each day. I’m praying lots. I firmly believe God needs us to do this work.
Faithfully following the call to resurrection life is not simple. It’s not easy. The courage of others who have mentored and taught me is what helps me to be able to see and name my hesitancy and conquer it. That’s the beauty of this shared life of faith. When I don’t want to maybe it’s you who will help me pick up my work and continue in the simple way of Christ Jesus. And hopefully I can do the same for you on your not-wanting-to days.
-Eilidh
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